Why Divorced Parents Should try 50/50 custody?
When going through a divorce, one of the most important questions parents should answer is: How will you handle physical custody of your children? For a quick overview of the different types of child custody, physical custody refers to who the child will live with and what parenting hours will be followed. This is different from legal custody, which determines who will be responsible for making important decisions about the child's education, such as his or her medical care or religious education.
If you and your foster partner have decided to have joint or joint physical custody, you will still need to work together to determine which parenting program is best for your family. 50/50 hours are one of the most common forms of joint physical custody, but parents should not abide by this agreement without first thinking in detail about whether it will work for their situation.
What to ask before deciding on 50/50 custody?
For many families, it is a priority for children to have strong and healthy relationships with both parents, especially after a divorce. Some may think that dividing their parenting time by 50/50 is the easiest way to achieve this goal. However, in order for it to be the best custody agreement for their children, parents must be able to commit to the details of a 50/50 custody program.
The distance between parents
Depending on the time they choose, 50/50 custody may require frequent exchanges between parents. If parents live a few blocks away or in the same neighborhoods, adding those increased exchanges won't be a problem. But if a significant distance separates the parents, incorporating multiple exchanges per week may not be ideal.
For 50/50 custody hours that require more frequent exchanges, communication must be on time and the conflict must be contained. Traffic jams go by, meetings can drag on, and if parents can't communicate productively and civilly with each other, these obstacles along the way can become bigger problems. If you and your foster partner are having difficulty maintaining peaceful communication, choose a 50/50 schedule with a minimum number of exchanges, or consider choosing a different division in parenting time.
Work hours and activities
Your and your partner's work schedules will be important in determining whether certain 50/50 custody programs are possible or not. However it is not only the work schedules that have an impact, the activity and the extracurricular schedules of your children should also be taken into account when forming parenting time.
Common custody hours 50/50
Not all 50/50 custody hours are created equal. Each has its advantages and disadvantages, so think about your own scheduling needs when determining which repeating pattern best suits your situation. To help you get started, here are 5 of the most common 50/50 custody schedule templates you can consider. To facilitate the explanation, we will refer to parents as Parent A and Parent B.
Once you have chosen your schedule
Whatever parenting schedule you have chosen, be sure to document it in your parenting plan and record it using a shared calendar between you and the other parent of your children. It is also important to remember that the schedule that works for you today may not be the best solution in the future as your children grow. Don't be afraid to periodically re-evaluate your scheduling needs and work with your foster partner to maintain an ideal schedule for your family.
What are the advantages of 50/50 custody?
There have pros and cons of joint custody but benefits are winner in many cases. The judges summarize them in the following:
- Children are guaranteed the possibility of enjoying the presence of both parents, despite the breakdown of couple relationships, such presence being similar to both parental figures and constituting the model of coexistence that is closest to the way of living of the children during the cohabitation of their parents, making the break less traumatic ;
- Certain negative feelings are avoided in minors, among which the following can be related: fear of abandonment; feeling of loyalty; guilty feeling; feeling of denial; impersonation feeling; etc…,
- a more open attitude of the children towards the separation of the parents is fostered, which allows a greater acceptance of the new context and avoids situations of conscious or unconscious manipulation by the parents in front of the children;
- According to co-parenting arrangements, Parents are guaranteed the possibility of continuing to exercise their rights and obligations, the parental power or responsibility, and to participate in equal conditions in the development and growth of their children, thus avoiding the feeling of loss that the parent has when attributes custody to the other parent and the lack of motivation that arises when the alimony must be paid, achieving, in addition, with it, a greater awareness of both in the need to contribute to the expenses of the children ;
- the suitability of either parent is not questioned ;
- There is an equalization between both parents in terms of free time for their personal and professional life, thus avoiding dynamics of dependency in the relationship with the children, since sometimes the pain and emptiness that separation produces tends to supply with the company of the son or daughter who thus becomes the sole reason for living of a parent; and
- Parents must necessarily cooperate, so the shared guard system favors the adoption of agreements, which also becomes an educational model of behavior for the minor.
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