5 Tips For Those Contemplating Divorce

5 Tips For Those Contemplating Divorce

The collapse of a couples’ marriage and the ensuing divorce process is often one the most nerve-racking times of a person’s life. The information provided in this article strives to ease some of the mental anguish that one is likely to experience while helping to avert a difficult and distressing divorce.

1) Think things over

When it has come to the point when you believe that your marriage is unable to be saved, don’t make the mistake that many do by thinking that you must commence divorce proceedings straight away. The best thing to do is take the time to think things over and carefully consider all your options before deciding to seek legal advice. Understandably, your emotional levels will be intensely high directly after separating with your partner, so it’s wise to let some time pass.

Whilst there are many advocates who claim that divorcing as soon as possible is the only way to truly put the past behind you and move in with your life, it may not be the best solution for you. However, if you have weighed up your options and believe that divorce is the right choice for you (and your children), then that is the time that you should look to engage with an experienced family lawyer.

2) Mediation and Collaborative Law

There are alternative methods of obtaining a divorce that doesn’t involve standard court proceedings and divorce lawyers. These include mediation services and collaborative law. Mediation can ensure that the entire divorce process is far more amicable for both parties involved. It’s often less expensive, faster and less traumatising than having to frequently engage with your attorney.

With collaborative law, both parties nominate a lawyer that has suitable experience in collaborative law matters and everyone convenes to negotiate and resolve the issues together. Each party has their chosen lawyer with them during each collaborative meet to advise them throughout the entire ordeal.

3) Be honest

To ensure the right decisions are determined and the best outcome is achieved for each party and their children and or dependants (if applicable), you must be honest with your lawyer. They cannot offer you sound legal advice if your declarations are false and misleading. It’s important to be forewarned that any attempts to hide or falsify information will almost always be discovered. Doing so will result in chronic repercussions, both from a legal and financial point of view.

4) Don’t let your emotions overwhelm you

A marriage collapse will often trigger a whole multitude of negative emotional feelings, including hatred, fear, and grief, but it’s important that you don’t allow these feelings to affect your decision making. Divorce is a procedure that must be resolved, rather than a fierce battle that you must ‘win’. Your family lawyer will utilise their expertise to not only help you obtain a divorce but also help you deal with the many pressures attached to it. If find yourself furious with your ex-partner and overcome with rage, notify your lawyer immediately, instead of sending a toxic email or SMS which will only aggravate things further.

When replying to a message from your lawyer concerning your case, it’s always a good idea to allow yourself time to clear your head and ensure that you conduct yourself in a civilised manner at all times. If your former partner chooses to resort to spiteful or even juvenile behaviour, always look to rising above it rather than ‘fight fire with fire’, as doing so will only succeed in creating more stress for you and result in more fees.

5) Communication is key

The best way to help guarantee a less arduous divorce process is to reach out to your ex-partner. The more you can cooperate and resolve things between yourselves, the less expensive and time consuming it will be. Doing so will give you the power to make your own decisions, instead of having them made for you by the court. When discussing financial issues, it’s important to be certain of what it is that you wish to accomplish beforehand to lessen the likelihood of needless arguments.

In the event that things do start to boil over, walk away. Don’t try and stand your ground and fight for what you feel is right. It’s always sensible to meet in a public area, where there’s less conflict. If your ex-partner is unwilling to discuss things with you face to face or if you feel that you could be the target of violent behaviour, then use the more conventional methods of resolution.

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