Twitter is RED HOT! Are you ready to enroll in the Twitter army? Would you like to be a...

Twitter loser?

I am going to give you an easy-to-follow 5 step program for being a Twitter loser.

1. Sell, sell, sell. Don't waste your time posting information and links that might actually be useful to your followers. Only post tweets promoting your products or services. Otherwise, how are people going to know what you are selling?

2. Tweet the same message over and over again. You know, through your years of marketing research, that it takes repeated exposure to your marketing message to get through. It makes sense, then, that you should say the same thing over and over and over again. Now you're a marketing genius.

3. Follow as many people as you possibly can, from all different industries, and from anywhere. The more followers you have, the more people who will read your tweets about what you're selling, right? Follow others and they will follow you back.

4. Forget about reading others' tweets. Who has time for all that reading? Your followers will read your tweets, even if you don't read theirs.

5. Avoid any kind of keyword research. It's just not worth the efforts. You know what you're doing.

In reality, this article is all one big joke. Do not do the things in this article. Don't be a Twitter loser. Do the opposite of most of the things listed above. Do not make the focus of your tweets sales messages. People don't like it when you repeat yourself over and over. Non-stop repetition will cost you followers.

It is fine to have have lots of followers, but make sure you focus your efforts on those who have something to do with your industry; users who arepossible sources of business contacts and referrals. Organize your Twitter account so that you can at least keep up with what people you find particularly interesting are talking about. Use Twitter to talk directly to other users. Finally, to maximize the exposure your tweets receive, use specific keywords in your tweets, with those keywords based on research into how people are actually searching.

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